Dogs with Small Children

When checking out some Web sites with top family dog lists, I came across this one. These are the top ten on the list:

1. Newfoundland





2. Pug


3. American staffordshire terrier (mislabled on the Site as a Staffordshire bull terrier)
   
4. Labrador retriever


5. Keeshond


6. Golden retriever


7. Collie
   
8. Standard poodle


9. Bernese mountain dog


10. English bulldog (they don't specify English or American, but the picture shown is an English)

I have some big issues with this list. Let's start with the pug. Pugs absolutely do NOT belong in homes with small children. While they are not agressive, their prominent eyes are very vulnerable to injury from the prodding of toddlers' fingers. I am glad to see that the staffordshire popped up on most of the family breed lists I came across. They are not the same breed as pit bull terriers (which are not all bad anyways), and definately deserve consideration. I have no experience personally with keeshonds, but have heard good things. Collies are not all Lassie. Their coat requires a great deal of maintenance which busy families may not be able to provide. These dogs also have a tendancy to be yappy, which can be frustrating with babies/children napping during the day. Bernese mountain dogs have fantastic dispositions, but with a thick double coat, they are unsuitable for warm climates, and shed profusely. As strong willed working dogs, they require a good deal more training than most families have the time to do.

My own top 5 would look something like this:

1. Standard Poodle- I was shocked to see the poodle fall so low on many top 10 lists. They are hypoallergenic- a BIG plus in a lot of families, but do require regular professional grooming as the coat does not stop growing. A lamb or puppy cut is a great way to keep your poodle's coat if they are not to be shown. They have great dispositions with lots of patience, but are also playful and lively to entertain older children. They were originally a sporting dog, but since this heritage is so far removed, they lack the persistant need for stimulation that many family dogs (such as labs) retain. A poodle will be happy curled up on the couch watching soap operas, or chasing the kids around outside. A wonderfully versatile breed, the standard poodle is my top pic.



2. Golden/Labrador Retriever- This one is a toss-up between the two. My personal preference as the proud mama to a yellow lab is obviously the labrador. The golden, however, seems to be a bit quieter than the lab, as well as less needy. If you own a labrador, it will be in your lap a large portion of the time or dropping a tennis balls at your feet constantly. A golden will doubtless want to play, but may be less persistant, and happily lie down if you ignore him. Both dogs shed quite a bit, but the hair of the golden is much more visable on your floors, and a golden will need more regular grooming as well as occasional trimming.




3. English Bulldog- Quick! Somebody on drool patrol! English bulldogs are a jolly and good natured breed, and although it won't bother the kids, the drooling can bother some adults. These dogs don't have the activity level to suit many active families, but for those who don't want a labrador retreiver roaring through the house knocking over everything in sight, an English bulldog is a great, couch potato dog.



4. Pembroke Welsh Corgi- The corgi is a great fit for families who want a smaller dog. Many small dogs are fragile and can be nippy with rough children. The corgi, however, is a great fit for families with children of all ages and is hardy enough to put up with rough playtime (though children should always be supervised with any dog).



5. Mixed breed- This one might really belong at the top of the list. Mixes are often very good family dogs. Usually mutts inherit the best personality traits of both parents. I had 2 mixed breed dogs growing up, and own a mixed breed now who is fantastic with my 9 month old, and has been since day 1. They tend to have very high pain tolerences and lot of patience. If you adopt a dog from a shelter, be sure to perform some basic behavioral tests to ensure that the dog is suitable. Many dogs who have suffered abuse or neglect have issues that make them dangerous around small children.

Remember that all dogs have their limits. No young child should ever be left unsupervised with a dog of any size. Socialization and basic training, even with little dogs, is crucial to ensuring that your dog is able to be the best family member which he/she can be.

Boredom with a Baby

If you're like a lot of new stay-at-home moms, you probably spend a good portion of the day trying to keep your baby entertained with the same old toys in the same rooms as you did every other day. You're not the only one who becomes bored with the routine. Babies get bored too. That toy that was brand new 3 days ago has lost its thrill, and you're at a loss as to how to keep your child interested in his/her toys and away from the things he shouldn't be playing with- dog toys, magazines, etc...

Outings

But where can you take a baby? They can't do anything. A trip to the park or playground might seem pointless as your little one is too small for the slide and monkey bars. Even if your baby can't play on any of the equipment, he or she will probably get a big kick out of watching the other children running around, screaming, and playing.

Walking is a fantastic way to not only burn calories, but also entertain your bundle of joy. Front baby carriers such as this one and wraps/slings like the Moby wrap work wonderfully for small infants. Framed backpack style carriers are great for older babies who will enjoy the bird's eye view that they have from these. Make sure to dress your baby appropriately for the weather- including a hat and sunscreen. If you're out of shape, walking is a good way to get back into shape. Just start with short distances, and you'll learn to enjoy the time you spend with baby enjoying nature together.

Making the Most of Toys

Obviously, you can't buy your baby new toys every time he/she loses interest in the current selection. What you can do, however, is keep things fresh. Make use of a toy chest or closet space to put his/her toys on a rotating basis. When boredom sets in, hide the old toys and bring out some toys from storage that he/she hasn't seen in awhile. Although, they aren't brand new, they are exciting as little one hasn't seen them in a few weeks. I keep about two or three fun electronic toys in my son's toy chest, giving him only one at a time. This toy is in addition to the smaller toys (blocks, balls, cars, and trucks) that he gets to play with every day. I change out the exciting toy once per week or so, and it keeps him more entertained than if he had access to all of them all of the time.

Amazing Obstetrician

So, check this out!

I could only dream of having an obstetrician who was this caring and open minded. My own ob was terrific and I love her. But she is like most doctors-set in her ways. I never thought to ask about pitocin at one of my appointments.

I figured if my labor stalled or I needed an induction, the topic would arise. I never thought that the virtual moment I walked into my LDR room I'd be started on a drip. The nurse typed in my info, checked my cervix, started me on iv fluids, and strapped the monitor on. Once I had a few contractions, the nurse told me they would give me a little pitocin, just to "tighten my contractions up to 2-3 min apart" as opposed to the respectable 3-5 which they had been. I tried to protest, citing that I'd rather walk if my contractions needed upping. Nononononono, I was told. I was to lie there so that they could get good readings on the baby and make sure he was responding well. Basically, "don't rock the boat." The nurse assured me that once my contractions got going they could taper me off of the pitocin. Ok...... A few hours later I found my pitocin being upped by the second shift nurse. At this point, has my doctor even seen me? No, but apparently my labor isn't hopping along fast enough. Will definately be making a point to discuss this issue early on with the next pregnancy.

I thought obs who believed in hypnosis, and labor without epidurals in general were just like unicorns- nice to imagine, but not real. It makes me think about finding another doctor. I do love my doctor. She's very nice, makes a point to ask me if I have questions, and even prods me if I don't ask much. She was very encouraging during the actual delivery, and checked up on me quite a few times after the birth. Not to mention, almost all of my female family members go to her and she attends my parents' church, so if I ever felt I had to switch...yikes!

So, what have your own childbirth experiences been like? Did your ob or midwife handle your pre-natal, labor/delivery, and postnatal care in a way that you liked? What would you have changed?

Natural Sex Selection

I recently purchased the book How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby which outlines the Shettles method to gender selection. The basic premise is that male sperm (XY) are smaller and quicker to reach the egg than female sperm (XX). XX sperm are larger, and therefore, hardier and longer lived than their male counterparts.

The Race is On
According to this theory, if a couple has sex on ovulation day, or very close to it, the chances are very high that one of the quick little male sperm will reach the egg first, and a boy will be conceived. If a couple has sex a few days in advance of ovulation, the male sperm will exhaust themselves and die off after a day or two of hard swimming. This will leave a higher concentration of stronger XX sperm waiting when the egg is released. The chances of conceiving a girl will be much higher in this scenerio.

Acidity Factor
Another big factor in determining which sperm have the advantage is the acidity level of the environment (vagina). Shettles argues that male sperm (being smaller and weaker) have less tolerance for a highly acidic environment than the larger female sperm. They prefer an alkaline space. How is this achieved? Female orgasm. If the woman orgasms during sex before the man does, her vagina will be more welcoming to male sperm. If the woman does not orgasm, the environment will be far more acidic. This will favor the female sperm, making conception of a girl more likely.

Personal Experience
The Shettles method makes a lot of sense to me. We used an ovulation prediction kit when conceiving our son. This pinpoints the hormone surge which precedes ovulation by a day or two. We waited to attempt to conceive that cycle until the hormone surge was detected. This means that the sperm were depositited fairly close to when I was going to ovulate. Viola! We conceived a boy!
I'm not sure if we're going to use the Shettles method or not for our next attempt at conception (whenever that may be). We would love to have multiple boys, but a girl next in line would be comforting. That way, knowing we had one of each, we wouldn't care if the 3rd was a boy or girl. As much as I love my son, I really would rather not have 3 boys. We'll get what we're meant to have, so I don't know if we can really control anything anyway. If the Lord wants me to have all boys, I'll have all boys, and if I'm to have 2 girls and a boy, or 2 boys and a girl, than that's what will happen. The book has been interesting, though, and I've enjoyed reading it.

MMRV Vaccine Linked to Febrile Seizures

photo: flickr by Salim Virji

I've already made my thoughts on America's vaccination policy known, but this latest tidbit which I've been made aware of takes the cake. As I am not currently vaccinating my son, I was unaware that an MMR/Varicella combo vaccine was even available. After reading about it straight from the CDC Web site, I wonder why in the world that it is. The MMR vaccine is controversial enough without adding a fourth component. But here we go...

More Side Effects

The MMRV shot comes with an increased risk for fever and rash, with 1 out of 5 vaccinated children suffering these side effects. Rash doesn't worry me too much, but fever is often a more serious matter than physicians lead parents to believe. The most serious issue related to fever is the risk of seizures and related brain damage.

Febrile Seizures

Those who receive the MMR have higher risk for febrile (fever induced) seizures than unvaccinated kids, but the MMRV poses twice the risk of the MMR alone. The Varicella vaccine by itself has not been shown to cause febrile seizures. Here's what the CDC says about febrile seizures:

Although febrile seizures can be frightening for the child's caregivers,
most are harmless. The majority of children who have febrile seizures recover
quickly and have no lasting effects.

Where are the statistics? What the heck does "most" mean? Do you mean that 51 out of 100 children will have no lasting effects, or 10 out of 100? I wonder how parents of children who have suffered permanent brain damage thanks to a vaccine related seizure feel upon reading these words. I can't help but feel as though the CDC is trying to pat me on the head and tell me to trust them. On what planet are seizures of any kind not a big deal???

Here are the most recent MMRV recommendations from the CDC.

Why do We Need MMRV?

If the MMR vaccine works just fine and has half the risk of MMRV, and the Varicella vaccine has no risk, than why are we combining them and upping the risk? What's wrong with 2 shots instead of one if it is safer for our babies?

Be advised that this next statement comes from a highly jaded, government distrusting, conspiracy warey, and insanely protective mother. They're trying to hog tie us into an all or nothing vaccine. Moms are getting more involved and more informed. We know that we can choose which vaccines are appropriate for our kids. This is terrifying the pharmacutical companies. Drug companies have already stopped producing seperate measles, mumps, and rubella vaccines, so that parents are forced to give all or nothing to their kids. Now, they are on a mission to force us to vaccinate for chicken pox (typically harmless childhood sickness) too if we want MMR coverage. Personally, I think chicken pox poses less of a threat to my child than seizures do, but hey, maybe I'm crazy. The drug companies want their money, and they've got the CDC doing all the dirty work. The big drug companies don't care if a few casualties happen on the way to their paychecks. The government protects them as patients are not allowed to sue drug manufacturers due to any vaccine related side effects.

Oh, my. I'm getting a bit worked up, aren't I? Enough of my ranting...

What Do You Think?

The Ins and Outs, Dos and Don'ts of Flying with an Infant

photo: flickr by Kossy@FINEDAYS'

I like to think that my son has become quite the little veteran at taking plane rides. His first flight took place at 2 1/2

weeks old. I wouldn't advise exposing a newborn to all the germs of an airplane flight, but we were moving, and it was necessary. We took an hour and a half flight, followed by a 2 hour flight. His next experience was at 5 months of age. We took a 45 minute flight, followed by a nearly 3 hour flight, then the same for the trip home. We'll be flying again in about 2 weeks. Here are some tips I've picked up along the way...

1. This one is absolutely critical. Book a morning flight. Always, always, always fly in the morning with an infant. My husband and I made the mistake of taking a flight which did not land until around 10 pm. As good as your baby might be, do NOT mess with bedtime routines. Our son screamed his lungs out for 20 minutes before finally falling asleep on that flight. Meanwhile, on morning/afternoon trips, he has happily played and napped through them.



2. Be prepared to nurse or bottle feed on demand. My baby has never showed discomfort from the pressure change, but some babies have a harder time. If your little one likes a pacifier, be sure to bring a few. If breastfeeding, don't forget a nursing cover to provide modesty while nursing in such close quarters.



3. Bring quiet toys. A little noise is ok- rattles and keys are a lot of fun to bang on the tray. A giggling Elmo or constantly singing stuffed animal, however, may be much more bothersome to other passengers. If your baby needs this, though, use them, because no toy noise is as bad as a fussing baby.



4. If baby gets bored with the toys you brought (I recommend packing one or two brand new ones) ask the flight attendant for a plastic cup. It is something new and interesting that may at least entertain your little one for the time being.



5. Relax. There is a real possibility that your child will have meltdown if your flight is of any substantial length. Babies cry- it's just what they do. How you handle yourself is much more important. Take deep breaths and try not to let your baby sense any stress you're feeling. Ignore glares from other passengers. Most of the time, however, other travelers are sympathetic rather than judgemental. Just do what you would normally do around your own house to calm him/her. Walk the aisle if you're able. Sing a lullabye. If nothing works, just wait out the storm. Despite what you may think they don't scream forever. Other passengers can just get over it.

My Natural Birth Story with No Sugarcoating

From long before I became pregnant, I had determined to give birth without pain medication. I was afraid of the needle, as I had a spinal tap as a child and remember well the sensation of that awful procedure. I also knew that epidurals, while for some women speed up labor, often can prolong labor or cause it to fail to progress, leading in some cases to a c-section. The C word was my worst nightmare. I've never been operated on, and with a few more children down the line, I knew that there was a high likelyhood that if I needed a section with the 1st baby, I would need one for subsequent children. As far as other drugs, I didn't want anything to come into my blood stream as it would then transfer to my child. Nurses called me brave (though I think they meant stupid) and my doctor told me to keep my options open. Most of my family said get the epidural. I promised myself I would give my son the best start in life that I was able to give him, come hell or high water.

Tues. Oct 13

• 38 week checkup, dialated 4 cm, anterior cervix still fairly thick

Wed. Oct 14

• 10am- wake up, lie in bed feeling typical morning contractions, had been contracting most mornings for the last week or two



• noon- mild contractions persist irregularly about 10-15 minutes apart, have never had contractions last past getting out of bed before so I am beginning to wonder if this is it



• 1 pm- call hubby in TX and tell him to get his plane ticket immediately and come home, have a feeling that this baby is coming soon



• 9:30 pm- pick up hubby from the airport with family, contractions now 7-10 minutes apart, contractions now quite uncomfortable and having a hard time standing through them



• 11pm- go to sleep despite persistance of contractions getting harder to ignore

Thurs. Oct 15

• 2am-awakened by uncomfortable contractions, I begin timing them at roughly 5-7 minutes apart



• 2:30am-I wake up husband and we continue timing as they steadily tighten up to 5 minutes apart



• 3am- heading off to the hospital, this is it, as I run around the house making sure I have everything the contractions become far more painful



• 3:30am- en route to hospital, contractions lessen in intensity and frequency



• 4am- check into labor/delivery, hooked up to iv and monitors, I'm told my contractions are 3-5 minutes apart, I'm checked and told that I am 4 cm dilated and 50% effaced, baby at 0 station, oxygen mask administered in order to get the baby responding better or something then removed after about 10 min.



• 5am- pitocin drip starts in order to tighten up my contractions to 2-3 minutes apart, intensity of contractions is building making it difficult to talk through them, breathing and relaxation help immensely



• 8am- cervix checked to be 4 cm (I'm very dissappointed) and 90% effaced (nurse says I'm almost fully effaced and dilation will happen quickly once this happens, yay!)



• 10am- cervix checked to be 6 cm and fully effaced, pain still bearable with concentration



• 11am-water breaks, cervix checked- 8 cm, ob is called, pain suddenly hits a new level as I enter transition phase and contractions are about 1 minute apart, I begin contemplating pain meds but husband helps me stay strong, pain gets to the point that at one point I believed that I would die, screaming, hair pulling, pull-ups on hubby's arm were all I could do



• 11:15am- terrifying pain level, cervix checked at 9 cm, nurses jumping around in the hall yelling for someone to get my doctor here now, urge to push begins



• 11:20am- urge to push is strong, cervix checked at 10 cm- fully dilated, still no doctor, am told by nurse to cross legs and not push



• 11:30am- am pushing a little bit whether nurse likes it or not- out of my control, feels so good to push and do something to alleviate the contraction pain, this stage is much less painful than 8-9 cm was



• 11:40am-finally obstetrician arrives and I am given long awaited permission to push, baby's head came into view after the first contraction and I'm told he has lots of light hair



• 11:45am- crowining, not too much pain



• 11:53am- whoa! the head is out, extreme discomfort in that region (though not a "ring of fire" as expected), and a bit of fear as I realize that he can't slip back in now- I have to do this right now, I ask my ob "Can I get him out on the next contraction?", she answers "That's up to you." Wow, up to me? that fired me up but good



• 11:55am- contraction begins, I scream "Get him out nooowww!" and bear down with all my might



• 11:56am- shoulders, body, legs, feet, onto my chest, a quick thank you prayer to the Lord, then oh, my gosh, he's here! I held him and cried.

What happened next

I wish my story ended with that happy moment, but unfortunately, I still had a great deal of pain ahead. I cuddled my little boy delightedly as hubby cut the cord. The doctor sat down there coaxing out the placenta. She asked me to push a few times, but I had no strength left to be of much assistance. My son was then taken to be weighed/measured and my husband went to watch. The placenta came out, but to my bewilderment, the doc said that all of it didn't detatch on the right side. She said she would have to put her hand in me to get the rest. Horrified, I repeated, "Your whole hand inside?" She nodded her head with sympathy. My husband left our son with the nurses and rushed back to my side when he heard, and held my hand tight. My doctor said she would count down from 10. My husband recalls that I screamed as though I'd been shot. The pain that swept up and down my body was 10 times more severe than what I had just been through giving birth. Our bodies are designed to give birth, and though it hurts, it's a natural process. This, however, was the most unnatural, painfully gruesome experience which I have ever gone through. "...3...2...1" She kept her promise, and I felt the immediate relief as she pulled her hand out of my uterus. Thank goodness, she had retrieved the rest of it. I was done...oh, wait! Not quite yet.

I had suffered 2nd degree tears in 3 directions (nice handiwork, son) and my doctor spent the next 45 minutes repairing me. So, instead of sharing in the joyful celebration with family upon my son's arrival into this world, I'm lying there being poked with a needle. She numbed me of course, but it kept wearing off quicker than she could finish me, so I felt a lot of pricks. Although, compared to the nature of what had been done to me before this, I wasn't phased.

Birth rarely goes the way you would expect it to, although, next time I shall discuss the pitocin issue with my doctor beforehand. Hopefully I can avoid tearing, but there are no guarantees on that or the placenta detatchment. You just have to know that even the worst case scenario (yes even a c-section) would be more than worth it to have your bundle of joy in the end.