The C-Section Epidemic in America

The World Health Organization recommends that a nation's rate of cesarean section births be at or below 15%. While most developed countries have a rate of around 20%, the c-section rate in the United States as of 2009 was a staggaring 32%. That's nearly 1 in 3! Why is this happening? A number of factors play into it, including the prevalence of inductions, increasing numbers of overweight mothers (often with gestational diabetes) giving birth to large babies, as well as the presumed convenience and ease of cesarean delivery. We can basically boil down c-section rationing into 3 reasons- fear, concern, or convenience.

Why Doctors and Moms are Opting for the Knife

The fear I am speaking of is not fear of health danger to the mother or baby. It's not a fear of the mother not being able to deliver successfully vaginally. It's a fear of lawsuits. In today's lawsuit-happy society parents may be inclined to file suit against a doctor and/or the hospital in the case of any health or cosmetic issue related to the vaginal delivery. While doctors do need to exercise caution, keeping safety of the mother and baby a higher priority than a natural birth, women shouldn't be pressured into surgery for failure to progress after only a short time period.

Another reason for c-sections is genuine concern over the baby and/or mother's health and safety. If a baby is struggling after being given ample time to move down on his own, a cesarian may be necessary. If baby responds poorly to contractions, showing signs of excessive stress, a c-section may be wise. In these circumstances the baby's well-being needs to be the top priority.

Unfortunately, one of the largest reasons for inductions and cesareans is convenience. The doctor or baby's parents want him out before Christmas, even though the due date is the 1st of January. The doctor has a golf game on Saturday, so lets get that baby out Friday night, even though mom's only been laboring on her own for a few hours. That baby is going to be big, so we need to induce at 38 weeks. The list of excuses for inductions and/or c-sections goes on. Some doctors simply schedule inductions during the 39th or 40th weeks to avoid the hassel increased fetal monitoring  (bio-physical profile ultrasounding and non-stress tests performed after the due date).

Cesarean Statistics
Having a c-section might seem like a simple procedure that gets the baby out quickly and safely. There are a host of reasons, however, why this major surgery should not be performed at the current rates.

• It is major surgery that involves many risks, including infection, scarring, and more.
• Complications lead to increased risk for the mother being further hospitalized and the infant needing time in NICU.
• Increased risk of uterine rupture during subsequent pregnancies (life threatening for mother and baby).
• Increased risk of placenta abnormalities in future pregnancies, causing hemorrhaging and possibly requiring a hystorectomy.
• C-section births make it difficult or impossible to have a large family.

What Can or Should be Done?
There are quite a few things that the medical community should be doing differently. Inductions need to be performed only in extreme health risk situations. Obstetricians should be resolute in fighting a woman's desire for a convenience-based induction. Pitocin should not be routinely administered. Women should be encouraged to move around and walk during labor to encourage regular contractions. This is only feasable if she is not hooked up to an IV and monitors. Doctors and nurses need to respect the fact that every woman labors differently, not necessarily at the standard 1 cm per hour pace. As long as her membranes are in tact and the baby is well, a mother should be able to labor as gradually as her body progresses naturally.

These changes aren't going to happen overnight. Until then, what can we do? Are we obliged to be victims of a careless and money driven medical machine? Absolutely not! You've got a lot of power. Up until recently, though, we haven't been exercising it. You can choose an obstetrician who cares about you, not just his or her assembly line of mamas. Better, still, you can choose a midwife and opt for a birth center or homebirth. Midwifery is on the rise in the US. Women are choosing natural childbirth, relying on techniques such as water and hypnosis to manage labor pain. If you choose an obstetrician and a traditional hospital delivery, do your homework. Have a heart to heart honest conversation with your md about your expectations for the delivery. If you want a drug free birth, remember that hospital beds are not the best choices for a comfortable labor. Bring a birthing (yoga/exercise) ball.

It's YOUR Birth!
Remember above all that this is your childbirth. Don't cave to an unecessary induction. Do switch doctors, even in your last trimester, if your current physician isn't meeting your expectations. Don't worry about your "due" date. It's only to give a general idea for the baby's expected arrival. Your baby doesn't suddenly become unsafe in your womb on this magic day. You might deliver as much as 2 weeks past this date. My own grandmother in-law went a whopping 43 weeks with one of her 4 pregnancies, delivering a healthy 7 pound baby. Most care-givers won't let you go past 42 weeks these days, but that's ample time for most pregnancies. Don't deal with any practitioner who won't at least give you 42 weeks. With proper fetal monitoring, there is little danger in going these few extra days.

I made a lot of mistakes in my first pregnancy/delivery. It was a painful experience, though, I thankfully did it vaginally. Second time around, I hired a midwife, and gave birth in a beautiful tub in a room filled with dim lighting and soothing music. I'll describe that magical experience in another post. The bottom line is that the skyrocketting cesarean rate isn't good for anyone- except possibly the doctors who make twice as much money from these risky deliveries. In developing countries, such as China, the rates are approaching 50% for this very reason. Women need to take a stand and take charge of their own births. The health of our moms and newborns is not improving as c-section rates increase. It's your baby and your body. Make the right choices, rather than what is convenient.

Getting Real about Breastfeeding- It Hurts...Even When You do it Right!

I'm a big time breastfeeding advocate. Let's be clear. Breast is best always, and I think every woman should at least try to exclusively breastfeed. That said, I'm sick and tired of all the bogus claims going around that nursing doesn't hurt, and if it does, it's your fault.

I was given some La Leche League literature upon being discharged from the birth center after Ben was born. Everything I read said, breastfeeding shouldn't hurt. If it does, your baby is latched incorrectly, and you need to change that to avoid sore nipples.

I've done this twice now, and let me tell you, it hurts- EVEN IF BABY IS LATCHED PROPERLY! Maybe some women get away with not feeling any discomfort, but in my experience that is not the norm. This is what happens when you breastfeed.

• Constant suckling on the nipple dries out the skin. This is a simple truth. The same way your lips become chapped if you lick them too often. It drains the moisture. Heavy application of Lansinoh cream can help, but it will not solve the problem. No matter how perfectly baby is latched, you're still drying out the skin- no avoiding it.
• Dry skin leads to cracking and/or bleeding. My nipples were cracked and bloody for both of my boys.

No big surprise, dry cracked nipples are sore nipples. It hurts while baby latches on, and while baby nurses. I made sure to do everything right with this most recent experience. Ben nursed tummy to tummy, had as much of the areola in his mouth as possible, lower lip pouted/good tongue action, with his chin massaging the breast with the jaw action. I could hear him swallowing, and I knew he was well latched. Didn't matter.

A week after his birth, the soreness began. My nipples began peeling. I liberally slathered on the Lansinoh. I'd cry, blubbering to my husband who wished so much to help. I looked at my little boy nursing so eagerly, clenched my fists and tried to find a happy place. Nipples continued to dry, and cracking began during the 2nd week. Soon a little blood began coming out with the milk. By week 3-4, the nipples were beginning to toughen, and scabs appeared. This was gross, as Ben would be nursing, and start coughing as a scab came off into his mouth- yuck! Nursing still hurt, but the pain was beginning to decrease. The latching process hurt, but the pain eased as he began suckling. By week 5, the scabs were gone, and nursing was no longer gross or particularly uncomfortable. It's been great ever since. Ben is 4 months old and still exclusively breastfed.

I advocate breastfeeding, but I don't approve of women being lied to about it. Moms try breastfeeding, can't manage to "do it right," become discouraged because it's not supposed to hurt, and quit. They think they're the only ones going through the misery of the first few weeks. First timers don't have a light at the end of the tunnel. They don't know that they're only a week or 2 away from pain free nursing.

Why can't we be honest with moms?! Yea, it might hurt like hell. But that's normal and will improve sometime in the first 6 weeks or so. You're normal for feeling pain. You're not doing anything wrong. You're giving your baby the best nutrition possible. So, white knuckle grip that Boppy pillow and power through. Those nipples will toughen, and soon it won't hurt as much. You might not believe it during week 3, but someday you'll love nursing, and someday after that you'll really miss it.

Check out this oh, so beautiful post from another mom (Metropolitan Mama) who endured the pain for her baby.

Breastfeeding can hurt. It's not always your fault. It's SO WORTH IT!

A-B-C...It's Easy as 1-2-7?

It's hard for us as proud parents not to compare our kids to those of our friends from an early age. From the time our babies are born, we're on Facebook bragging to the world about how soon little Timmy rolled over or said his first word. As our little ones reach preschool age, our pride in them can lead us to compare their academic achievements with others.

Is John below average? Deborah's daughter is 4 months younger than him, but she can count to 20. John barely gets to 5. There must be something wrong...

Do you ever find yourself experiencing this type of thought pattern? I think most of us do from time to time. Honestly though, preschool learning has very little, if anything to do with success in upper levels of school. This Wall Street Journal article discusses the potential benefits and drawbacks of our preschool system. In fact, one of the lasting effects of preschool education is a minor increase in behavioral problems.

Preschool is popular, not for the benefit of children, but rather for the convenience of parents. Kids can get all of the structure and socialization necessary through parental teaching and parent arranged playdates. Because many parents choose to or need to work, however, preschools have become the norm, with 2/3 of four year olds attending them.

How can you be sure that your child will be ready for kindergarden if you choose to opt out of preschool? Easy- teach them yourself. This is the most sensible solution for stay at home parents. Unfortunately, it's not always easy. My stubborn just turned 3 year old has been nearly impossible to teach. He learned his colors and animals quite easily through life experience- me pointing out a red balloon or a horse or whatever. When it comes to actually sitting down with him and convincing him to try to learn something, though, forget it.

He can count to 10. I've heard him do it. Will he do it if I ask him to? Absolutely not. If I try to force the issue, he'll turn into a blubbering mess. Colton's always been one to learn on his own terms. He was a late walker, but the day he started walking, he could do it well, along with running and walking backwards. Same thing for potty training- I knew he could do it long before he knew. The week he potty trained, he would be dry all day and all night. He won't try to do something unless HE knows he can do it. If he has any degree of uncertainty, he will flat out refuse to try. It's a really frustrating aspect of his personality, and one that I hope he can work through as he gets older.

For this reason, I've taken a laid back approach to his homeschooling. I bought the rigorous curriculum packed full of fun activities, but it'll have to wait. All kids mature at different paces. We work on letters and memorization as he is open to it. I don't want to turn him off to learning completely. He loves to use the iphone to trace his alphabet and learn letter sounds. He can take control of his own learning without worrying about failing in front of anyone. I hate that he's afraid of failing in front of me. He shouldn't be embarassed or scared to try. I'm always positive and encouraging, but I think it's just something that he needs to grow and mature out of.

I know that he learns some in his Sunday school class, but definitely not at the pace of the other, slightly older kids in it. First kid is always experimental. We'll see how things go, but I'm hoping that we'll get better at it and be able to homeschool through elementary levels. If anyone has any tips to share, I'd love to hear about your experiences.

Cloth Diapering Lesson 1- Using Prefolds

Ok folks, I never thought I'd be the type of mom to use cloth. I'm just not that crunchy. Yea, I breastfeed, use alternative vaccine schedules, and make my own baby food, but I don't limit myself to organic products, don't worry about GMOs and don't cloth diaper...until now.

When we got pregnant with Benjamin, it became a matter of necessity, not a feel good thing for the environment or my baby's bum- though I still don't like finding those gell beads on them from disposables. If we were going to afford this 2nd baby, I would need to exclusively breastfeed, and use cloth to reduce our diaper bills. So, I use cloth during the day, and 2 or 3 disposables at night. This saves us about 6 daytime disposables every day. That adds up. Oh, and I use disposables when we're out of the house, cuz carrying around poopy cloth diapers is just yucky. I might get over that someday, too, though.

So, what do I use? The world of cloth diapering has gotten quite large. It's not your grandma's flats with safety pins and rubber pants any more. Let's see, there are flats or prefolds with covers, all in ones, all in twos, pocket diapers, and a lot more. You can get soakers to use with prefolds; you can use flushable liners to catch poopy. You can even skip washing almost all together by using biodegradable/flushable inserts with covers. This is going to pretty much eliminate the cost efficiency of it, though. For our family, the cheapest and easiest solution was prefolds (we like Osocozy Unbleached Indian Prefolds) with covers (Thirsties Duo Wraps are our faves).

I bought all of our products on Amazon.com, and spent about $100 to hold us through the first 6 months (hopefully). This included 1 dozen infant sized prefolds, and 2 dozen regulars, as well as 5 covers (4 Thirsties, and 1 Blueberry). I like the Blueberry cover as well, but it did cost more, and was not suitable for him until he got to about 12 lbs. The leg gussets are still a bit loose at 14 lbs.

So let's get started. First, lay the prefold flat underneath baby's bum. I like to fold the edge down about an inch for extra protection for those wild breastfed poops. Line the edge up about to baby's belly button level.

Ok, I'll be demonstrating an angel wing fold. Other suitable folds for catching breastmilk poop include the jellyroll and bikini twist. For the angel wing fold, you'll fold each side of the prefold to the center, creating "wings" up to the waist. Here, I'll show you...

Great! Once you get to this point, just pull the folded material up through baby's legs snuggly. My diapers are still a bit big, plus I like added absorbancy in the front for my boy, so I fold the front down as well.

Once you do this part, it's just a matter of hooking it all together with a Snappi. I didn't mention Snappies earlier, but I got mine off Amazon, as well.

The angel wing fold is great because the wings form gussets that hold nice and tight to baby's thighs.

Now just snap or velcro your cover on over the prefold. Be sure to tuck in the prefold, so that none of it is showing out of the cover. Otherwise, you'll leak.

Now, you're done! That's one type of fold for one style of cloth diapering. I''ll get more in depth and discuss various other folds and options another time. Thanks for reading; be sure to tell me your favorite fold  or favorite cloth diaper! And a big thanks to Benny for his cooperation :)

Growing Bigger and Better

Yes, it's been a long time without any updates. I'm now a work-at-home mama with two precious boys. Benjamin joined us on July 26 of this year. His birth was astounding, but we'll get into that in a different post. For now, let's just update on where we are now.

My Colton is a rambunctious and loveable 3 year old now, growing into a fantastic little person in his own right. We're gradually introducing homeschooling into his daily routine, so stay posted for updates on that.

Benny has been the most laid back and pleasant child that I could have imagined. He nurses beautifully, and at 3 months, is still exclusively breastfed. We've also joined the wonderful world of cloth diapering. I'm sure I'll be posting in more detail my thoughts and experiences with that.

For us, though, it was an economic necessity. Like I said, I do work part time from home, and we rely on that income for some bills. Should we have waited on number 2...maybe, but not really. I wanted my kids to be 2-3 yrs apart to give each other a playmate. We had enough income to get by, as well as health insurance, so we're not completely stupid. Money is still tight. As long as the economy keeps limping the way it is, money is still going to be a struggle for us. There aren't any raises in the near future for hubs I'm sure. The love in our home makes it worth it every day. As long as we've got each other, we'll get by.

We just celebrated our first Halloween as a foursome, and I am so excited about the upcoming holidays with my beautiful family. I'm also really hoping to carve out time at least once a week to do a bit of blogging. I write for money these days, so it's nice to write and share about my own life. Great to be back!

Reflections from the Past Few Years

Two years ago, I was 8 months pregnant and alone. Well, not quite. I had a wonderful sister-in-law who moved in with me. Emotionally, however, I was in knots. I was awaiting the most exciting and terrifying occurance in my life to date, but my support system was gone, aside from nightly phone calls.

The Story

We got pregnant thinking that life would be smooth sailing. Clint brought home a great paycheck, we had a home with 2 empty bedrooms, and money in the bank. We didn't know what hardship was. Did real life ever sneak up on us and slap us upside the head when Clint lost his job? Oh, yea. Even with his years of experience and expertese, there was no job to be found in our city, or even state.

Then came Texas. Clint applied all over the country for positions, and got a phone call from the h.r. department of an enormous company that had an opening in their San Antonio office. The next thing you know, I'm in labor and frantically calling him to get on a plane back to Florida ASAP.

We never wanted to move across the country. Our families are all here in FL, and nothing but uncertainty waited for us in Texas. With my mom and 2 1/2 week old son, we boarded a plane and headed west. My mom left a few weeks later after helping us get settled, and I cried for days. I've never lived more than a 45 minute's drive from my parents, even in college.

We had a rough time of it. We had very few friends, and I was incredibly lonely. Clint's job was stressful, and mine was even worse. I called my mom at least once a day, and often bothered Clint at work, when I needed talked off a ledge (Either our baby was going out the window or I was). I'm mostly joking on that one, I was stable enough not to ever seriously consider something crazy like that. I did get overwhelmed pretty frequently. I think 6-8 hours straight of daytime screaming would do that to anyone.

A year ago, we made the decision to come home. We weren't %100 percent that he'd have a job waiting for him, but we took the leap anyway, and fell flat. We lived with family for 6 months while he worked at a grocery store. Then we took the plunge and moved back into our house (that had been rented while we were gone). Didn't know how we'd pay for it on his salary, but we went for it anyway. Then things got even worse and his hours were cut. After 2 weeks of that, we got the fantastic news that he would be rehired at his old company. The rest is history.

A Learning Experience

Looking back on it, I am glad that we made that big move, and that I had the opportunity to learn and grow as a person and in my faith.

• I learned to be a mom. I had no help (except for my mom's visits, and Clint's weekend efforts). This pushed me to my emotional and mental limits. I've learned through trial and error (mostly error) what works and what doesn't. Like not to fight him when he's a fussy wreck. Get in the truck and go for a coffee. Change of scenery is vital for maintaining sanity. Now that I'm home with family, I'm having such an easier time that I can even juggle caring for him with a part-time writing job.
  




• I learned to jump without a chute. My faith grew by leaps and bounds during the whole experience. We learned that you can't always see what's at the bottom of the cliff. Sometimes, you have to pray, then close your eyes and take a giant leap. God has promised good, and will not let us fall. It was about time we started really trusting Him.





• I learned to pray with power and conviction. I can pray expecting a result, not just begging, whining, and hoping for one.
  

Clint and I also really strengthened our own relationship throughout everything. It snapped us out of newlywed phase and really tightened our bond. I think trials and tribs either break couples or make them even stronger. We're sure not broken ;)

Here's to the Future

I don't know if our troubles are over for a while, or not. But, frankly, I don't care. We're not going to base our life decisions out of fear, but rather out of faith. Whatever comes our way, we'll conquer it.

God is good all of the time!

My Kid Eats Better Than I Do!

Perhaps I sit alone in this boat, but my son's eating habits are far better than my own. And believe me, I am not complaining! When I got pregnant, I made the choice to really improve my nutrition for the sake of my growing baby. I breastfed as much as I could from birth up until he weaned himself at 13 months. When he began eating solids, I made my own baby food for him, and only fed him organic baby food/snacks with no additives/preservatives when I did store buy it occasionally. He didn't even taste refined sugar until he was around 1 year old (obviously with his b-day cake).

Now, as an 18 month old, his eating habits are inspiring. He's a bit thin due to his high activity level and low fat/sugar diet, but he's as healthy as they come, and is setting up great habits for life. For examples, he happily eats lettuce with no dressing. He loves to eat fresh tomatoes and cucumbers as finger food. Of course he indulges in french fries and less healthy foods occassionally when we are at a restaurant. Now, he'll sometimes turn down ice cream in favor of strawberries. It's remarkable to me, as I see other moms prying chicken nuggets out of their kids' fingers, and others stuffing them into them.

Here is a typical day of food for my little one.

• Breakfast- Cheerios or corn flakes and fresh fruit like strawberries, blueberries, and bananas


• Morning snack- crackers and/or more fruit


• Lunch- ham/turkey and cheese sandwich or roll-ups (piece of cheese rolled up in a meat slice)


• Afternoon snack- Gerber Yogurt Melts, whole grain Goldfish, or Cheerios


• Dinner- whatever we have, typically a meat, pasta (or other grain), and vegetables (asparagus are his favorite vegetable)


• Dessert- a few bites of ice cream or a couple small cookies, sometimes more fruit

To me, that diet sounds pretty healthy, especially compared to the diets of other 1 1/2 year olds that we meet here and there. People are always blown away as they watch him chomp happily into a slice of raw onion or scarf undressed salad. I don't know if he's just a healthy eater or if it all has to do with how I fed him as a younger baby. Either way, I like it! How do your kids eat?